What is Real Love?

Anyway, I have presented here some of the questions that teenagers often ask. The answers are based on the book "Questions Young People Ask, Answers That Work" published by Watchtower Bible and Tract Society of New York, Inc.

During adolescence stage, a teenager starts to notice the opposite sex and new feelings and emotions are felt. But the confusing emotions that most teenagers battle is to distinguish love from infatuation or other feelings.

What is Real Love?

Real love is sometimes confused with infatuation. Others thought that they are truly in love with a certain person that is why they rush to certain decisions like getting married or living with this person. Some regret their hasty decision. But what is real love?

* Love Versus Infatuation

Infatuation is counterfeit love. It is unrealistic and self-centered. Infatuated persons tend to have a tendency to say ' I really feel important when I'm with him. I can't sleep. I can't believe how fantistic this is.' Notice how many times either "I" or "me" is used? A relationship based on selfishness is bound to fail? Note, however, the Bible's description of true love,"Love is long-suffering and kind. Love is not jealous, it does not brag, does not get puffed up, does not behave indecently, does not look for its own interests, does not become provoked. It does not keep account of the injury."(1 Corinthians 13:4,5)

Here are some of the tips to distinguish love from infatuation:

* Love:
1. An unselfish caring about the the interest of the other.
2. romance often starts slowly perhaps taking months or years.
3. You are attracted by the other person's total personality and spiritual qualities
4.The effet on you is that it makes you a better person.
5. You view the other realistically, seeing his or her faults, yet loving that one anyway.
6. You have disagreements, but you find that you can talk them out and settle them.
7. You want to give and share with the other person.

* Infatuation:
1. Is selfish, restrictive. One thinks, 'What does this do for me?'
2. Romance starts fast, perhaps taking hours or days.
3. You are deeply impressed or interested in the other's physical appearance.('He has such dreamy eyes.' 'She's got a great figure')
4.A destructive disorganizing effect.
5. Is unrealistic. The other person seems perfect. You ignore any nagging doubts about serious personality flaws.
6. Arguments are frequent. Nothing really gets settled. Many are settled with a KISS.
7. The emphasis is on taking or getting especially in satisfying sexual urges.

Remember the following:
* A person who constantly puts you down before others may well lack genuine love

* A physically attractive, but senseless, man or woman is 'like a gold ring in the snout of a pig.'

*Your heart may speak, but trust your Bible-trained mind. Get to know more than the person's external "image". Give the relationship time to blossom. Remember, infatuation reaches a fever pitch in a short time but then fades. Genuine love grows stronger with time and becomes "a perfect bond of union."-Colossians 3:14.

*Source: "Questions Young People Ask, Answers That Work" published by Watchtower Bible and Tract Society of New York, Inc.